It Just Sucks

I have to say, sometimes this crunch sucks. No, wait -- that's not true: It always sucks; just sometimes it sucks more than other times.

I went to the grocery store today, and it took me forever to shop for the few items I ended up getting. I considered -- and then reconsidered -- virtually everything I put in my basket, basically asking myself if what I had picked up was something I would actually need/use this coming week, or whether I was buying it for something unplanned -- and therefore unnecessary.

Granted, the good thing is that I managed to keep my visit under forty bucks (practically unheard of in this area). But still, it's frustrating. Humbling.

Christmas is coming and though I have only a few gifts to get, I'm already stressed out about how I'm going to swing it.

And there's a class I really want to take. It starts in January and I really need to give myself something to do, something to look forward to. I shouldn't fret over something that costs only $160, but I am. I have the money in savings, sure, but I'm so paranoid about touching my savings. I feel guilty, even.

I'm just fed up with having to monitor every thing all the time. But I have to if I ever want to get out of this mess I made for myself.

It just sucks.